The Best Little Boy in the World: The 25th Anniversary Edition of the Classic Memoir

As a very young child, the author’s parents praise him as “the best little boy in the world” (BLBITW). Such parental praise may be relatively common, but our hero truly takes it to heart and spends many years trying to live up to the perceived expectations of his parents and others. When he realizes that he prefers boys to girls he sublimates those feelings, since the BLBITW most certainly can’t have such feelings. It isn’t until he finishes college and enters the working world that he realizes the pointlessness of denying his feelings.Although widely praised as a landmark of gay literature, “The Best Little Boy in the World” is a flawed book. However, even in the flaws there are perhaps some lessons to be learned. The story can be easily divided into two distinct parts: before and after coming out.The first half of the book recounts the author’s memories of his childhood, when he proudly boasts of being “the best little boy in the world” and does everything he can to retain his title. He is studious, polite and well behaved. However, when he begins to understand that other boys don’t want to “play cowboy” with their friends, the seeds of doubt begin to creep in. Perhaps the BLBITW is just a phony. Still, he soldiers on, throwing himself into schoolwork and sports while ignoring his attraction to other men. This part of the story can be amusing, and the author can appear a little endearing.Things change a lot in the second half of the book, when the author sees the futility of denying his feelings and comes out. He spends almost a year trying to make up for lost time. In that time, he realizes that he’s quite attractive to other men, and he becomes the very worst kind of gay man; the kind that looks down on anyone less fit and handsome than himself. He also spends a lot of time musing on what “makes” someone gay, even though he claims to be sure that he was made that way. His whole attitude makes the second half of the book a lot less enjoyable.Despite the sometimes cringe-inducing attitudes of the author, the book is an interesting read. It is probably a good depiction of the early days of gay liberation, post-Stonewall and pre-AIDS.

The Best Little Boy in the World is like a time capsule. It's fascinating to see how nomenclature and attitudes have changed from the 70's, the time this book was written. Andrew Tobias is such a good writer that you become engrossed in this memoir of his adolescent, teen, and young adult years. Knowing that his same-sex desires were not acceptable almost by osmosis, and closing his closet door so tight that he doesn't get out until after college. That he got out at all seems like a miracle. Of course, knowing how successful he would become in later life makes you want to know how he managed that feat. Though attitudes have changed quite a bit since the 70's, and this is all pre-Aids, it is a worthwhile read. If I could make every young gay read this book I would. So they would know the great strides we've made since then, and also that the struggle for acceptance continues.

Andrew Tobias writes a poignant and touching autobiography of his young life as a closeted boy coming of age in the Northeastern US in the 50's and 60's. He reflects deeply on the issues and feelings which keep him closeted. He also is very open in reflecting on the dark side of his nature fostered by his self-deprivation and years of denial. His strong intellect, sense of "duty" to his family, as well as other components of his life and personality help him succeed in stiffling his true nature for years. I found myself almost continuously relating to this journey into manhood, self-acknowledgement, and then finally, a degree of self-acceptance. At the book's closure he has gradually risen out of the closet although he is still a very young man working on the life issues that we gay men still work on today.The book is quick reading and very reflective. It is filled with bits of wisdom, and humor. I would strongly recommend it as core reading material for all gay people in or out of the closet, as well as anyone who might be struggling with acceptance issues regarding gay loved ones.

I gave this book four stars largely because of its importance in LGBT history. It was the fist successful book about a gay man coming out in a straight world. At the time it was written in the early 1970s gays were viewed by society as being mentally ill, sick and certainly not normal. This book helped to change that view in that it showed a child growing up in a loving home doing much what all children do and being very successful in school academically and socially. As an adult he realized that the difference he had always felt from other boys was that he was homosexualcontinued. With this insight, he came out to the world and since then has continued to be successful while experiencing a fuller appreciation for who he is.

An account of a respectable young man from a very middle-class family whose struggle with, denial and coming to grips with, in a manner of sorts, his "shameful" lack of interest in "girls" and secret crushes on "boys". This experience was lived during the times that it was outright dangerous to be openly gay, so "John Reid" was exceedingly successful in that respect. I felt that he could have shared this account with less intimate detail of his sexual experiences and put more emphasis on the social and political climate of the mid to latter 20th century gay experience. Clearly, at the time, it was a break-through book whose subject matter needed to be expressed objectively.

I guess the moral for those thinking of coming out is- come on, you will feel much better. I could relate to the young years. I knew by age 8 I was somehow different from most boys. I never wanted sex with any girl. Was a virgin to women until my honeymoon, but certainly not to men. Married to please my mama and everyone else in my small town. One daughter and 12 years later at age 34, the act finally ended and my life began. HallelujahHave now been with same man 30 years.

Riveting !!!

I had read the book many years before. In the rereading of it was even more informative and interesting than the first time.