---
product_id: 10949728
title: "Lost and Found: The Adoption Experience"
brand: "betty jean lifton phd"
price: "S$48"
currency: SGD
in_stock: true
reviews_count: 9
url: https://www.desertcart.sg/products/10949728-lost-and-found-the-adoption-experience
store_origin: SG
region: Singapore
---

# Lost and Found: The Adoption Experience

**Brand:** betty jean lifton phd
**Price:** S$48
**Availability:** ✅ In Stock

## Quick Answers

- **What is this?** Lost and Found: The Adoption Experience by betty jean lifton phd
- **How much does it cost?** S$48 with free shipping
- **Is it available?** Yes, in stock and ready to ship
- **Where can I buy it?** [www.desertcart.sg](https://www.desertcart.sg/products/10949728-lost-and-found-the-adoption-experience)

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## Description

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## Images

![Lost and Found: The Adoption Experience - Image 1](https://m.media-amazon.com/images/I/516j6g4n3GL.jpg)
![Lost and Found: The Adoption Experience - Image 2](https://m.media-amazon.com/images/I/61-bT4nO8BL.jpg)
![Lost and Found: The Adoption Experience - Image 3](https://m.media-amazon.com/images/I/31BkQNoBwLL.jpg)

## Customer Reviews

### ⭐⭐ 







  
  
    Dated
  

*by G***S on Reviewed in the United States on January 5, 2019*

This book was originally published in 1979. Although it has been updated several times, including as recently as 2009, it still seems dated. In the chapter "Varieties of Reunion Experience," we are introduced to "ALICE and FAY--Mother a Suicide." One paragraph begins, "Fay would probably never have thought of searching if she hadn't taken a part-time job as a companion for the children of a divorced man in her community." The next chapter, "Father--The Mini-Search" is oddly short and addresses the different kinds of birth fathers, including "The Macho Father," "The Father Who Cares," and "The Ambivalent Father." Next comes a chapter on "Siblings," and the reader is warned about genetic sexual attraction and incest. "Can we say that, having been cast out of the natural flow of generativity, Adoptees as outsiders feel less bound by the taboos that inhibit others?" "Or is it that the romanticism Adoptees feel toward the blood tie is eroticized when they meet the sibling of the opposite sex or a birth parent?" The next chapter focuses on "The Unsuspecting Spouse" and begins: "Sometimes I feel sorry for the men and women who unwittingly marry Adoptees. How can they know that locked within this winsome partner is the waif who can never completely trust, and perhaps not even love?" I don't even know what to say about a later chapter entitled: "Birth Mothers--Are They Baby Machines?"The book contains some useful information, but it's conveyed through a 1970s lens. I was adopted in 1970 and recently found my birth parents without even searching (thanks Ancestry.com). I bought this book and others to help me prepare for what I suspected would be a very difficult conversation when I shared the news with my adoptive parents, who had always discouraged me from searching. Perhaps the reason this book, with it's dated examples and language, rankled me so much is because it represented the outdated ideals and values that I was preparing to argue against.

### ⭐⭐⭐⭐ 







  
  
    Good, but biased
  

*by M***R on Reviewed in the United States on January 28, 2013*

I got the feeling that because the author had issues with adoption, the writing was biased toward the fact that if you are adopted, you MUST have issues.  I do believe that adoption adds issues to your life and your personality, but it doesn't mean that it is the same for everybody.  I think this is a good book for adults who were adopted a long time ago. I also bought "Being Adopted, The Lifelong search" by David M. Brodzinsky, and found it to be less biased, and more in tune with the issues we are facing today, and more positive in general to the adoptive parent/adoptee relationship.  If you are considering being or are an adoptive parent, I recommend this book over Lost & Found.

### ⭐⭐⭐⭐ 







  
  
    Not Perfect, but a Must Read
  

*by H***Y on Reviewed in the United States on September 7, 2013*

Although this book is not perfect, it does give everyone's perspective and that is invaluable. There is no room for individual selfishness in the adoption triad which includes the adoptive mother, adoptive father and birth mother. Even if the loss is acknowledged, there will still be a rocky road, but if the adopted person's loss or birth mother's loss is denied, the road will be predictably bumpier for those two in particular.

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*Product available on Desertcart Singapore*
*Store origin: SG*
*Last updated: 2026-02-24*